That, Herb, is right on! Definitely a missed affordance there, and there have been others that I can pin down. Given my attention deficits I am guessing that there have been others that I have not even been aware of. I would like to think that I know better now, but then there was the young lady in my story who gave me a face-to-face and very definite wink in my favorite coffee shop, whereupon I wished her a very nice day and went about my business.

There is a postscript on that one, by the way. I have since seen the coffee-shop woman again, engaged her in a conversation that she almost seemed eager to have, and exchanged names. No contact information exchanged yet, but perhaps an affordance still exists.