Super sexy story, Shannon!! I am like you in that I have not had the opportunity to touch a woman sexually for way too long now. I used to think that I was just too unaware and unskilled in the art of making those connections (see https://medium.com/@johnnovak_43277/its-always-ladies-choice-in-my-universe-32530e7725e0), but after an earlier post of yours I think I may instead be a demisexual. I have no problem making connections with lovely women every day, and have made many friends, but that is where it usually stops.

I have found, however, some good substitutes for the kind of touch you are talking about. I do Yoga, Pilates, and Gyrotonic method, and when you do private sessions with practitioners in those arts there is a lot of touch involved. Those disciplines involve a lot of tactile cueing — my yoga coach, for example, was a body sculptor. As I did the asanas she would use her hands to shape my body into the desired form.

Learning the Gyrotonic method ( https://www.gyrotonic.com/) also involves a lot of touch. Yesterday I did a session on the Gyrotonic tower, and my teacher was sitting on the bench behind me as I did my arch and curl exercises using her hands to palpate my gluteals, inner thigh muscles, and back/shoulder areas to achieve the proper positioning. This is not a sexual touch, but I would qualify it as a “grownup touch”, and many of the practitioners have very healing touches and provide some very positive and much needed human contact.